I May Have Taken a Vow of Celibacy

so me and Mr. Alabama went out last night to Auckland's one big gay bar.
The bar it's self, Family is the name of the bar, is not so bad. it's more of a club then a bar and looks the part. there were about 3 dozen disco balls throughout the place most in big clusters, including a veritable disco ball orgy over the dance floor in the back. beers were ordered (Alabama keeps his money in one of those undershirt pouches which i always find kind of silly) we walked a lap of the bar which was still relatively empty (it was at least 10:45). decent bartenders and at least one cute boy there but nothing too earth shattering. there is also a small room full of digital slot machines off to one side of the front of the building.
over all the place was sort of like (sorry for those of you who don't frequent the SF gay bars as this explanation will be useless to you) the worst of Badlands mixed with a fair amount of the good things from Bar on Castro, with just a small hint of the Mix. it was kind of awful. of course i'm never particularly fond of gay bars anyway but this really is not going to be my favorite place in Auckland by a long shot. there is a really strange mix of trashy young guys, Maori transsexuals, gruff looking old guys (three of whom had their shirts off) and a fair amount of girls.
me and Mr. Alabama stood outside on the nice enclosed smoking porch and talked, he is a weirdo. he's probably a libertarian (he was talking about government being paternalistic) and i'm not quite sure if he is actually religious or just has a vestigial fondness for it, he is studying law and has a boyfriend. him having a boyfriend is not why we didn't make out, he was talking about how he would be disappointed if he didn't hook up with lots of people while out adventuring (he has quite the multi city travel plan).
[before we left the hostel he was chatting with his boyfriend through Skype, and i'm pretty sure at one point they were having Skype-phone-sex or at least i think his boyfriend was doing something naughty on his end of the line. i was eavesdropping like a maniac.]
so finally around 12 more people started to show up to the bar and we made another walk to the back to see how things were going on the dance floor, on queeny 20something with his brutish friend were dancing away, the aforementioned old guys with shirts off, some awkwardly dancing mid 40s business men and an Asian couple making out rather furiously. the one cute guy we saw when we came in was nowhere to be found. we returned to the front smoking area, where Mr. Alabama started to talk with a cute-ish couple, which would have been fine except that he was trying to talk about race issues with two people he'd never met (one white, the other either of Maori decent or pacific islander of some kind (i tried to not get too involved in the conversation)) and being sort of furiously racially insensitive, not actually racist but just so blunt and odd and nonsensical that he almost started a fight. we also started to talk to the queeney 20something from the dance floor until he started slagging and drooling a little pre-vomit on the counter next to him.
it's not so much that i hated this bar, i've hated lots of bars, its more that i don't really have many other options. maybe when i have a job and feel more like a resident of the city i will find some place that i like that is gay enough but as it stands i don't hold a lot of hope for my Kiwi dating prospects, and really at the moment i'm kind of stressed/cranky about lots of other far more important things.
as it is now i'm not sure if i'm going to stay here the whole year, but who knows my mood could change tomorrow. and maybe some intentional celibacy would be helpful to my life, who knows.